That Floating Excrement Was Way Too Symbolic! It's the Television Disappointments of the Year.

As we reflect on the TV landscape of the recent year, a selection of series stand out not for their brilliance, but for their notable shortcomings. Ranging from awkward sequels to bafflingly bad docuseries, here are the programmes that left us scratching our heads or simply reaching for the remote.

And Just Like That

Where to begin with this love/hate follow-up? Plagued with woeful scripts, cringe-inducing arcs (we demand better for Miranda!), and a paltry 71 seconds of fan-favourite Samantha, the show struggled to find its footing. Briefly, as the third season started, it seemed as if it had finally hit its stride. Then arrived an installment centered on Seema’s natural deodorant. No wonder the showrunner announced this would be the last season. It concluded on a low point; the closeup of Miranda’s loo flooded with poo was just way too on-the-nose. Yet, fans certainly had a hoot picking apart every single “wtf?” moment. And as Carrie – a single woman once more – twirled around her palatial townhouse to Barry White, who didn’t release a small sob?

All’s Fair

‘Is Kim Kardashian an actress? Of course she can’t.’

But that was practically the least of this show's problems. The recipient of a exceedingly uncommon no-star review, it was hard to know where to start listing the flaws. The laughably wooden writing? The mind-numbing veneration of affluence and consumption? The almost wilful procession of tropes? Acting so bad they felt borderline malicious? Suffice it to say “each and every one” and forget about this show again. However, a new season has been commissioned, so we’re probably going to have to.

The Charlie Sheen Documentary

Given the legal troubles, domestic violence allegations and fatherly shortcomings, it’s fair to say Charlie Sheen has been a bad boy. Not you’d really have gleaned it from this three-part docuseries which chuckled along at Sheen’s various bouts of self-destructive hedonism while struggling to tell us a single thing we weren't already aware of. Instead, it felt as if this loose cannon was being indulged, so any pity this show might evoke should be reserved for the people who have had to suffer proximity with this charming but flippant narcissist.

The Supercomputer Drama

Of course we understood it was ridiculous from the get-go: a drama about a supercomputer known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either solve global crises – or annihilate all of humanity. We stuck with it out of sheer admiration for its stars … but by the end, it felt like even they had stopped bothering. One scarcely reacted when his character died, and the other ultimately slicing Charlie with an axe … in super slow-motion. Talk about giving up the ghost.

MobLand

Dodgy characters convening in deserted boxing gyms? A certain band's Firestarter blaring in club scenes? The late 90s called and demands its gangland drama back.

Actually, that is harsh on the gangland dramas of the late 90s. Many seem a bit old-fashioned now, but at least they didn’t suffer the ignominy of having to indulge baffling accents. But there were plenty of other problems. Mainly that it was just profoundly boring; a conflict over narcotics territory between various cockney rogues which seemed a bit basic.

The Meghan Markle Series

Given the extent to which she grinds the gears of the nation’s performatively enraged commentators, it’s temptingly easy to admire the Duchess of Sussex’s televised ventures into quaint homemaking as deliberate provocations. But then you watch them and are forced to concede that in this case, they might have a point. It’s like watching a homeware catalogue come to life; a poster for wine o’clock with ideas of grandeur; a parade of sleeping dogs, humming beehives, Hallmark sayings and pointless crafting “hacks” you’ll not remember instantly. All underpinned by immense, largely undeserved wealth. Ugh.

The Beckham Documentary

There are obviously fascinating things to be said about both Victoria Beckham and her journey with career, self-image, self-worth. But for some reason, this documentary series opted not to say them. Rather, the experience was akin to reading a marketing brochure. She clearly has good reason to resent what she describes as her “stern” image. But unfortunately, she didn’t do herself any helps with this cagey non-event of a series.

The Inheritance

It should have been the next big hit – except even camper, with a famous star playing dead and a well-known personality managing her inheritance. What more could you want? As players competed, there was plenty of betrayal and squabbling. But the rules quickly became incomprehensible: it’s even now too confusing to detail what exactly was happening. Even more disappointingly, we only saw brief appearances of the star via prerecorded videos. The series ended up reeking of a production that was straining desperately to live up to something way beyond it.

The Lena Dunham Romcom

How does one follow a show that defined a generation? The expectation was immense for this starry romcom about Jessica, a hopeful New Yorker who lands in London with a broken heart. The star took her biggest role by the horns and was a delight to watch, reveling in Jane Austen levels of romantic ideals. But it was all very glossy and, paradoxically, was insufficient. Plus, the sheer amount of famous cameos involved felt icky.

The Sketch Show Return

Not even good enough to be ‘uneven’.

Given the shrewd recruitment of talented emerging comics, expectations were high. But sadly, most of it didn’t land. A particular sketch was a one-note joke stretched to a dry pulp but repeated in every episode. One star seemed too ready to slip into a familiar irate mode. The behind-the-scenes sketches, meanwhile, simply inspired the thought that they should probably have remained in there a while longer.

The Twisted Tale of Amanda Knox

This dramatisation of the story of Amanda Knox was executive produced by Amanda Knox and pretty much exclusively showcased the viewpoint of Amanda Knox. So, while there probably is an compelling drama to be made about the horrific 2007 murder, this was not it. The subject matter needed to be handled sensitively. Rather, the series struggled painfully to find the right tone, lumbering from strangely jaunty, slightly stylised farce to inevitably, real-life horror. Complex? Perhaps. A total mess? Very much so.

Prime Target

We love the star … but did we buy him playing the greatest maths genius since, a man so intelligent he’s on the brink of a discovery that could destabilise society? No! This international thriller about secret services targeting – and killing off – academics frankly got more absurd by the second. Formulaic nonsense.

The Bonnie Blue Documentary

This uncritical portrait followed the online personality notorious for sexual escapades as she prepared for her most extreme challenge yet. What on earth would possess her? What we craved was far greater examination of her true psyche, plus those of the men in the line. They could at least have interviewed the legendary mum who appeared to haul her son out of the queue. What we got was horrific imagery and zero interrogation of her infamy whatsoever. And to think, the filmmaker has a teenage daughter too.

Daryl Kirk
Daryl Kirk

A passionate wellness coach and writer dedicated to empowering others through mindful living and self-care practices.

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